Creative Spirit Presents Tools for Transformation

In "The Princess and The Pea" a tale written by Hans Christian Anderson, a waif is revealed to be a princess because she can feel a tiny pea hidden under 20 mattresses and 20 down comforters. Let's revisit this story from a new perspective.

Imagine that the waif represents you. In your mind, climb to the top of the pile of mattresses covering the pea. Lie down and snuggle comfortably under the layers of soft, white, billowy, down comforters. Now imagine the pea is a metaphor for your Essence.

In your imagination, return to yourself as a baby. Imagine yourself as fully integrated with your Essence. During your childhood you began to feel that when you displayed some of your Essence qualities, you felt rejected or unloved. You decided you needed to hide parts of your Essence in order to fit. You placed a mattress over your Essence (over that pea) in order to feel safe. As you grew, more and more of your Essence qualities seemed to bring you pain. Through the years you laid more and more mattresses over your pea. Each mattress was manifested when you perceived and then believed that you needed to push away an element of yourself in order to fit into you family and environment.

The mattresses represent perceptions and beliefs you adopted in order to cover up your Essence so you could thrive, or perhaps even survive, during your childhood.

As your Essence became buried layer by layer (mattress upon mattress), your Essence qualities may have been gradually lost to your conscious memory. Your mattresses, instead of your Essence, began to dictate your responses to life. You went on "emotional automatic pilot," reacting to events in your life in habitual ways, instead of listening to your Essence. Somewhere along the line you learned how to tune your true self out.

In an effort to comfort yourself along the way you began collecting "comforters." Comforters can be material possessions, or a job that looks good from the outside, or "trophy" people, or in some cases drugs, alcohol, or food. Comforters bring instant relief from the stress of your buried Essence. Yet, the relief does not last long. As the anesthetic effect of the comforter wears off, you find yourself seeking more and/or different comforters. No matter what comforters you choose, the result is the same. You end up feeling as if something is missing in your life.

You have created a major dilemma. You will never have enough of any of these comforters if you depend primarily on them to bring you meaning, harmony, passion, or peace in your life. Do you have a fear of losing your comforters? If the answer is yes, you have traded parts of your Essence for your comforters. As long as you keep looking for external sources of "comfort" in your life, you will continue to feel, "There must be something more." Guess what? There is!

When you allow yourself to feel the discomfort of the "pea" (there must be something more) it is a signal from your Essence. That signal means that the suppressed parts of your Essence are longing to be brought to the surface. Your mattresses and comforters are no longer serving you, and in some cases, they are smothering you. As an adult you have the opportunity to evaluate and transform these mattresses and comforters. Adulthood is your time to be who you are and create the life you want to live. Are you ready to listen to the call from your Essence? Are you willing to answer the call? Is it time to create conscious intent to uncover and embrace your Essence? Yes? Then you can allow it to be easy.
When you answer your "Call to Essence," you can keep your comforters or throw them away. If you keep a comforter just recognize it as a comforter ~ as something you choose (not need) to have in your life.

Think of a dear friend or loved one. Write down the name of first person that comes to mind in the space below. Under his/her name write the qualities you most admire (i.e. honesty, integrity, joyful, compassionate). Please don't confuse qualities with characteristics (a great golfer, a good teacher, a successful businessman, etc.). Qualities are not learned; they are natural attributes. Do this now before you read any further.

Name: _________________________________
Qualities:

Now that you've identified these qualities in someone else, know that these are your natural qualities! That is why you are so attracted to them. You have just discovered some the qualities that make up your Essence. This is who you really are. Some of these qualities surface often, others only come up occasionally, and some you only allow yourself to experience when you feel safe. Some of these qualities may be so buried that they have not consciously registered with you in a long time. You may not even remember you had them.

Next, think of a mentor or someone you consider a hero. You may or may not know him/her personally. Write his/her name down and make a list of his/her admired qualities. This time you know that these qualities are all a part of your Essence. After you identify them, allow yourself to embrace them as your own.

Name: _________________________________
Qualities:

Now think of one more person you look up to and their special qualities. Each time you write down a quality, know deep within yourself that it is yours as well. Own it!

Name: _________________________________
Qualities:

Review the qualities listed for the three people above. You have just described your own Essence. You are all these things.

If you have any doubts that these qualities are who you really are, ask someone with whom you feel safe and who loves you to list your qualities for you. My experience with this exercise has shown me that there is a remarkably high consistency between the qualities you admire in other people and the qualities that your loved ones see and admire in you. Sit with this awareness for a moment and allow yourself to welcome this as a rediscovered part of yourself.

In the space below write, "I am" and complete the sentence with one of your Essence qualities. Below that write, "I am" and add another Essence quality. Continue until you have listed all of the identified qualities of your Essence. You can continue to add to this list as other Essence qualities come to your awareness.
I am ____________________________________________________________________
I am ____________________________________________________________________
I am ____________________________________________________________________
I am ____________________________________________________________________
I am ____________________________________________________________________
I am ____________________________________________________________________

I am ____________________________________________________________________
I am ____________________________________________________________________
I am ____________________________________________________________________
I am ____________________________________________________________________
I am ____________________________________________________________________
I am ____________________________________________________________________

While reawakening your Essence, you will begin to tap into your intuition and bring ease to your life. Choices become clear when they are made from your Essence rather than by the many conflicting messages all around you. There's no more guesswork about what will make you happy. You'll have the ability to feel whether a certain path will make you happy before you travel it and achieve the reward at the end of it. You'll become more confident as you realize you don't need outward approval for your life.

You'll find the courage to make life-transforming decisions. You'll find it easier and easier to live the life you were meant to live rather than the one people expect you to lead. You can find happiness and purpose by living from your innate Essence. Your Essence is who you are at the core of your spiritual being. Your Essence embodies the qualities you were born with. Allow yourself to begin sharing the real you with others. Take baby steps if that feels the safest way for you!